School Hard
~~~~~~~~~~ Prologue ~~~~~~~~~~
In every generation there is a chosen one. She alone will stand against the vampires, the demons and the forces of darkness. She is the Slayer.
Sunnydale High.
Cut to Snyder's office. He's lecturing Buffy and Sheila.
The camera pans from Sheila, looking blase', over to Buffy, looking apprehensive.
Sheila: I didn't stab anyone with a trowel. They were pruning sheers.
Snyder: On the other hand, Sheila has never burned down a school building.
Buffy: W-well, that was never proven. The Fire Marshall said i-it coulda been mice.
Snyder: Mice.
Buffy: M-mice that were smoking?
Snyder: The two of you seem to be tied in the class cutting and fight starting events. You really are neck and qneck here. It's quite exciting.
Sheila: What does the winner get?
Snyder: Expelled. (Buffy looks at him in shock) Thursday is Parent- Teacher night. Your parents, assuming you have any, will meet your teachers, assuming you have any left. I've decided to put the two of you in charge of this event. You have three days to prepare the refreshments, make the banners and transform the school lounge into a habitable place for adults. This will incur my good will. And may effect what I tell your parents when I met them. Are we clear?
Buffy: I'm clear. (to Sheila) Don't you feel clear? (Sheila just looks back) We're very clear.
Snyder: Good. Because you mess up this time, and your parents will be coming to clean out your lockers.
Cut to the school's main entrance. The bell rings. Buffy and Sheila come walking out of the building.
Sheila: Yeah, sure, whatever. (yells) Hey, meat boy! (walks off)
Xander and Willow meet up with Buffy.
Buffy: His two worst students. That's what mom sees when she looks at me. A Sheila.
Sheila kisses an older boy with long, blonde hair. Xander: Well, Sheila's definitely intense. That guy with her? That's the guy she *can* bring home to mother.
Willow: She was already smoking in fifth grade. Once I was lookout for her.
Xander: (to Willow) You're bad to the bone.
Willow: I'm a rebel.
Buffy: It's not fair. I'm the Slayer. That requires a certain amount of cutting and fighting. What's Sheila's excuse?
Xander: Homework. She won't do it. And most teachers respect that now. Oh, you might wanna keep away any sharp implements when you're working with her.
Buffy: Do you think any of the other Slayers ever had to go to high school?
Xander: It's no biggie. You'll have a nice soiree'. The parents will love it. As long as nothing really bad happens between now and then, you'll be fine.
Buffy: Are you crazy? What did you say that for? Now something bad is gonna happen!
Xander: Whadaya mean? Nothing's gonna happen.
Willow: Not until some dummy says, 'as long as nothing bad happens.'
Buffy: It's the ultimate jinx!
Willow: What were you thinking? Why were you even thinking at all?
The girls give Xander looks of exasperation and walk off.
Cut to a park at night. An old classic car crashes through the 'Welcome to Sunnydale' sign and
screeches to a halt. Spike gets out and strolls over to the curb. He takes a deep breath and lights a
cigarette.
Opening credits roll. Buffy's theme plays.
Inside Colin's warehouse.
Vampire#2: As long as the Slayer's alive, whoever takes his place will be sharing his grave.
Vampire#1: Then let the soul who kills her wear his mantel.
Colin: Can you do it?
Vampire#1: Yes. This weekend, the night of St. Vigious, our power shall be at its peak. When I kill her, it'll be the greatest event since the crucifixion. And I should know. I was there.
Spike: (appears behind them) *You* were *there*? (chuckles) Oh, please! If every vampire who said he was at the crucifixion was actually there, it would have been like Woodstock.
Vampire#1: I oughta rip your throat out.
Spike: (turns his back to him and strolls away) I was actually at Woodstock. That was a weird gig. I fed off a
flowerperson, and I spent the next six hours watchin' my hand move.
Vampire#1 rushes him from behind, and Spike swings his fist up without even looking, hitting him in
the face and knocking him down and out.
Colin: Who are you?
Spike: Spike. You're that Anointed guy. I read about you. (growls at vampire#2) You've got Slayer problems. That's a bad piece of luck. Do you know what I find works real good with Slayers? Killing them.
Colin: Can you?
Spike: A lot faster than Nancy-boy there. Yeah, I did a couple Slayers in my time. I don't like to brag. (can't keep a
straight face) Who am I kidding? I *love* to brag! There was this one Slayer during the Boxer
Rebellion, and...
He senses someone behind him and turns his head to look as he morphs into his human guise.
Drusilla: Look at all the people. Are these nice people?
Spike: We're getting along.
Drusilla: (stares at Colin) This one has power. I could feel it from the outside.
Spike: Yeah. He's the big noise in these parts. Anointed, and all that.
Drusilla: (to Colin) Do you like daisies? Hmm? I plant them, but they always die. Everything I put in the ground withers and dies. (looks up and off into space) Spike? I'm cold.
Spike: (puts his jacket around her) I've got you.
Drusilla: I'm a princess.
Spike: That's what you are.
She pricks Spike on the cheek with her fingernail, and a bead of blood flows out. She reaches up and
licks it off. They move close to kiss but don't, and instead look over at Colin.
Colin nods. Drusilla bows her head down and puts her hands to her temples.
Spike: It's done, baby.
Drusilla: Kill her for princess?
Spike: I'll chop her into messes.
Drusilla: You are my sweet... my little Spike.
Spike: (to Colin) So. How 'bout this Slayer? Is she tough?
Cut to Buffy's room. She's standing at her mirror, trying to brush her hair.
Joyce: What's wrong?
Buffy: I spent a good part of my allowance on this new cream rinse, and it's neither creamy nor rinsy.
Joyce: Life is hard, dear.
Buffy: Don't I know it. Is that a split end?
Joyce: I got the mail.
Buffy: Good.
Joyce: Which included a reminder notice about Parent-Teacher night. Thursday.
Buffy: That's good.
Joyce: Which you were planning on telling me about?
Buffy: Oh, for... (faces her mom) the last two weeks.
Joyce: Uh, huh. So, what do you think your teachers are gonna tell me about?
Buffy: Well, I think they'll all agree that I always bring a pen to class, ready to absorb the knowledge. (sits on her bed)
Joyce: And, uh, this absorption rate? How is it reflected in your homework and test scores?
Buffy: What can you really tell about a person from a test score?
Joyce: Whether or not she's ever going out with her friends again.
Buffy: Oh, that.
Joyce: Well, I look forward to meeting your principal.
Buffy: Won't that be something.
Joyce: (comes over to the bed) Look, sweetheart. Life is more than grades and homework and not getting kicked out of school. (sits next to Buffy)
Buffy: I know.
Joyce: But we moved once because of you getting in trouble. And I had to start a new business, not to mention a new life in a whole new town.
Buffy: And you don't wanna do it again.
Joyce: What I don't want is to be disappointed in you again.
Buffy: Mom, that's the last thing that I want, too. (exhales) I'm trying, I really am. I just... I have a lot of pressure on me right now.
Joyce: Wait 'til you get a job. Sleep tight. (gets up and leaves)
Buffy gets up from her bed and walks over to her desk. She pulls open the top left drawer. In it is a jar
of holy water, a cross, a few stakes, a set of brass knuckles. She looks up at her reflection in the
mirror.
Cut to the school. Cut to the lounge. Buffy and Willow are working on a banner.
Buffy: D'you think you can help me cram some French tonight? I don't want Mr. DeJean telling my mother I'm an imbecile.
Willow: I thought we're going to the Bronze tonight. 'Cause of how you thought Angel might show?
Xander: If he does he'll meet some other nice girl? Studying comes first.
Buffy: We're going to the Bronze. I can study and party and do Parent- Teacher night and make my mother proud
as long as I don't have to...
Giles and Jenny come walking in.
Buffy: ...fight vampires.
Giles: (to Jenny) There is nothing in the chronicles about a-an extraneous lunar cycle.
Jenny: The order never accurately calculated the Mesopotamian Calendar. Rupert, you have *got* to read something that was published after 1066.
Giles: Very funny.
Xander: What's the up, guys?
Giles: W-um, Ms. Calendar has been researching, well, uh, surfing on her computer, a-and she's... Well, according to her calculations, this Saturday is the night of St. Vigious.
Buffy: Let me guess: he didn't make balloon animals.
Giles: No, he led a crusade, of, of, uh, vampires. They swept through Odessa, Iran, and points east.
Jenny: And they didn't leave much behind.
Buffy: Well, if I survive Parent-Teacher night tomorrow, I'll see what I can do about Saturday.
Giles: You're being a tad flip, don't you think? This is serious.
Buffy: And getting kicked out of school is laughs aplenty?
Giles: You know what happens when you, you let your life interfere with your slaying.
Buffy: Okay, well, if my slaying doesn't get me expelled, then I promise my banner making won't get me killed, okay? Just please let me get through this week.
Giles: This Saturday's going to need a great deal of preparation.
Willow: Well, we'll help.
Xander: Yeah, I'll whittle stakes.
Willow: A-and I can research stuff.
Xander: And while I'm whittling, I plan to whistle a jaunty tune.
Giles: Yes, your help will be greatly appreciated, but when it comes to battle, Buffy must fight alone. You are, after all, the Slay... (sees Snyder in the hall) ...slay-ve. Slaves. You're, you're all slaves to the, uh, television.
Jenny: Yes.
Giles: Young people now days. (to Jenny) Shall we go?
Jenny: Mm, let's. (they leave)
Snyder comes over.
Xander: (laughs nervously) No.
Willow: We're hindering.
Snyder: She ditched. (takes a deep breath) Mm. I feel an expulsion coming on.
Buffy: No. No, actually, Sheila's been helping us for hours. Um, she just went to get some more paint.
Sheila comes in the door behind Buffy and takes off her glasses. Buffy notices Snyder looking
behind her, turns around and sees her.
Snyder: Just make sure everything is perfect on Thursday. (turns and leaves)
Sheila: Thanks for covering. Guy's a serious rodent.
Buffy: No problem.
Sheila: Did you really burn down a school building one time?
Buffy: Well, not actually one time.
Sheila: Cool.
Cut to the Bronze. Nickel is the band tonight. They're in the middle of playing "1000 Nights".
Xander dances lamely by himself as Willow helps Buffy with her French at a table.
Willow: No. But you said, 'The cow should touch me from Thursday.'
Buffy: Maybe that's what I was feeling.
Willow: And you said it wrong.
Buffy: Oh, je stink.
Willow: You're just not focused. It's Angel missage.
Buffy: Well, he didn't say for sure. It was a 'maybe see ya there' kinda deal.
Xander: Guys, I'm all alone out there. Somebody has to dance with me.
Willow: Well, we are studying.
Xander: C'mon, one dance. You've been studying nearly twelve minutes.
Buffy: No wonder my brain's fried.
She gets up. Willow starts to protest, but Buffy and Xander drag her along with them.
Spike walks up to their table and watches them dance as the band starts a new song, "Stupid Thing".
Spike walks along the edge of the dance floor and studies Buffy intently. Xander and Buffy dance
lively. Willow doesn't move much, but smiles widely, enjoying herself. Spike goes over to vampire#1
at the bar.
He comes back to some people near where Buffy, Willow and Xander are dancing and speaks loudly
so that Buffy is sure to overhear.
Buffy runs from the dance floor. Spike watches her go. Cut outside to the alley. Vampire#1 has found
a young woman. She trembles with fear as he grabs her neck and moves in for the bite. Buffy grabs
him by the shoulder and pulls him off of her. He somersaults and rolls up to his feet.
Buffy: Slayee!
She does a roundhouse kick to his face. He only flinches a bit. He swings at her, but she sidesteps
the blow. She swings back, and he grabs her arm, swings her around and throws her into a metal roll-
up door. She hits it high and hard and falls to the ground, but quickly gets up again. He swings again
and hits the metal door with his fist when she ducks the punch. Xander and Willow arrive. Buffy
blocks the vampire's punch and holds on to his arm. She looks behind her at the others.
She turns her attention to punching the vampire repeatedly in the face. Willow grabs the woman and
pulls her away and out of danger.
Xander runs to find a stake. Spike looks on from the side. Cut inside to the table. Xander goes though
Buffy's purse. He pulls out a yo-yo and sets it aside. He pulls out a tampon and quickly drops it like a
hot potato. He finds a stake, and rushes back out. Cut to the alley. Buffy punches the vampire's face
again and then his chest. He gets loose from her and lands a punch on her face. She goes spinning
down to the ground and lies there, momentarily stunned. The vampire looms over her.
He bends down to get her, and she kicks him in the face. He staggers backward as she maneuvers to
he feet.
Buffy looks over at Spike in the shadows. Xander is back with the stake.
She turns to him and he throws her the stake. She catches it out of the air, and in a smooth, swift
motion plunges it home into the vampire's chest. He doesn't even have time to fall before he crumbles
to ashes. Spike comes out of the shadows slowly clapping his hands. Buffy looks at him with a
confused expression on her face. Willow and Xander see him, too.
Buffy: Who are you?
Spike: You'll find out on Saturday.
Buffy: What happens on Saturday?
Spike: I kill you.
Buffy is speechless and just watches him leave.
The alley outside the Bronze. Sheila comes out with two guys and they walk along the alley.
She's gotten a bit ahead of Dwayne and stops to look back at him. She sees he's gone.
She looks the other way at Del, and he's gone, too.
She turns around and is startled by Spike.
Spike: Who do you want me to be?
Sheila: Did you see...
Spike: ...those two losers who thought they were good enough for you?
Sheila: What happened to 'em?
Spike: They got sleepy.
Sheila: Huh?
Spike: And you got something a whole lot better.
He slowly walks past her and down the alley. She follows him with her gaze.
She starts after him. The camera follows her, but then pans down to Dwayne and Del, dead in a pile of
trash. Cut to the library. The table is full of books, and Xander, Willow and Jenny are looking through
them doing research.
Buffy: Maybe he's reformed.
Giles: Perhaps he went by another name in... times past.
Jenny: Well, whoever he is, we'll need all the help we can get come this Saturday.
Xander: So, this night of St. Vigious deal. If they're gonna attack in force, aren't we thinkin' vacation?
Willow: We can't run, that would be wrong. Could we hide? I mean, if that Spike guy is leading the attack, (shudders) yeeehehehe.
Giles: Well, he can't be any worse than any other creature you've faced.
Angel: (suddenly appears) He's worse. (they all look at him) Once he starts something he doesn't stop until everything in his path is dead.
Xander: Hmm. So, he's thorough, goal oriented.
Buffy: We were at the Bronze before. Thought you said you might show.
Angel: You said you weren't sure if you were going.
Buffy: I was being cool. C'mon, you've been dating for, what, like, two hundred years? You don't know what a girl means when she says maybe she'll show?
Willow: Wow, two centuries of dating. If you only had two a year, that's still, like, four hundred (Buffy gives her a look) dates with four hundred different... (looks at the mace on the table) Why do they call it a mace?
Giles: Uh, we do have slightly more urgent matters to discuss.
Buffy: Yeah, like keeping my mom away from Principal Snyder tomorrow night?
Jenny: And not dying Saturday.
Giles: Angel, do you know if this Spike fellow goes under any other name?
They all look where he was, but he has disappeared. The library doors finish shutting.
Cut to Drusilla's room. There is chanting going on elsewhere. The camera pans from her bed past her
TV and lamp and over to her collection of dolls. She lifts one and turns it to face away.
Spike: (comes up behind her) Darling, are you going to eat something?
Drusilla: I'm not hungry. I miss Prague.
Spike: You nearly died in Prague. Idiot mob. This is the place for us. (leads her to the bed) The Hellmouth will restore you, put color in your cheeks, metaphorically speaking, and in a few week's time...
Drusilla: (lies back on the bed) The stars will align, and smile down on us.
Spike: (leans over her) And then, God, this town will burn.
Drusilla: (giggles) Oh, pretty, fire!
He rolls over her and lies down next to her.
Spike: St. Vigious is coming up. Should be a party.
Sheila is tied up and gagged with her hands hanging from a hook above her.
Spike: Dru...
Drusilla: The boy doesn't trust you. They follow him. (sits up) I think sometimes that all my hair will fall out and I'll be bald.
Spike: (sits up) Never happen. Alright. (gets off of the bed) I'll go up and get chanty with the fellas, buy *you* (goes to Sheila) got to do me one favor. (takes Sheila off of the hook) Eat something. (hands Sheila to Drusilla and leaves)
Drusilla: (turns Sheila to the dolls) You see, Miss Edith? (cut to the doll facing away) If you'd been good you
could (cut to Drusilla in her game face) watch with the rest.
Sheila looks at Drusilla, but can't scream because of her gag. Drusilla roars and moves in for a quick,
violent bite. Cut to the school the next day. Willow checks the crossbow. Jenny walks behind her
with extra pieces of wood to make stakes and sets them on the table between Cordelia and Xander,
who are whittling away. Jenny continues walking over behind Buffy. Buffy holds up a large sharp
machete, then starts chopping something with it. The camera pans down to show that it's a cucumber. She's preparing a vegetable tray.
Xander: Does anybody remember when Saturday night meant date night?
Cordelia: You sure don't.
Buffy: Ooo! Parents start arriving in an hour. Okay, so, um, banners are in place, the lounge is comfy... What am I forgetting?
Willow: Punch?
Buffy: Punch. I need, I need punch!
Cordelia: My fingers are cramping. How long have I been doing this?
Xander: Three minutes.
Cordelia: So, can I go now? She doesn't need this many stakes. I mean, if this guy Spike is as mean as you all said, it should be over pretty quickly. (Buffy looks up at her) We're still all rooting for you on Saturday. I'd be there for you myself if I didn't have a leg wax.
Buffy: You guys hold down the fort. I'm punch bound.
She leaves the library. As soon as she's gone Xander and Cordelia both reach over and grab
something off of the vegetable tray. Buffy sticks her head back in the door.
Cut to later at Parent-Teacher night.
Buffy is doling out the punch into cups. Willow comes over.
Buffy: Uh, lemonade. (hand her a cup) I made it fresh and everything.
Willow: How much sugar did you use? (takes a sip)
Buffy: Sugar?
Willow grimaces at the incredibly sour taste, and puts the cup down.
Buffy: Okay, now all I have to do is keep my mother and Snyder from crossing paths for the rest of the night.
Willow: (sees Joyce) Hi, Mrs. Summers.
Joyce: Hi, Willow. Hi, honey. Did you, uh, do all this?
Buffy: Yeah! Um, (picks up a cup) here, have some lemonade. (sees Snyder) Right after Willow shows you the library. I have to stay here and hostess. (puts the cup back down)
Willow: Great, the library. (puts her arm around Joyce's shoulder) Uh, um, ooo, no, G-Giles and everyone...
Buffy: ...is locked in there studying. Right. French class it is!
Willow leads Joyce away. Snyder comes up to Buffy.
She grabs a cup and a ladle full of lemonade and turns toward him.
Snyder doesn't believe a word of it, and makes tracks to follow Joyce and Willow. Buffy lets out a
worried moan and looks up at the clock. 6:15. Fade to 8:45. Cordelia comes walking in.
She stares at Buffy's face.
Cordelia: You're starting to look a little slagged. What, are you just skipping foundation entirely now?
Buffy: Cordelia, I have at least three lives to contend with, none of which really mesh. It's kind of like oil and water and a... third unmeshable thing.
Cordelia: Yeah, and I can see the oil. (sees Joyce talking to Willow) Is that your mom? (Buffy looks) Now that is a woman that knows how to moisturize. Did it, like, skip a generation?
Joyce: (comes over) Well, I believe that I have seen every classroom on campus, and just as I get there all your
teachers miraculously have stepped out.
Willow smiles over Joyce's shoulder, proud of herself.
Snyder comes up to the group. Joyce offers her hand to him.
Snyder: (ignores her hand) Principal Snyder. I'm afraid we need to talk. My office is down here.
Joyce follows Snyder to his office. Cordelia watches them go with a huge smile on her face.
Willow: But you did such a good job.
Cordelia: When they're done talking...
Buffy: What?
Cordelia: My guess? Tenth high school reunion, you'll still be grounded.
Buffy gives her a look.
Cordelia heads over to the punch table. Cut to the library. Giles and Jenny continue their research
while Xander keeps whittling.
Jenny: There who is?
Giles: Our new friend Spike. He's known as 'William the bloody'. Earned his nickname by torturing his victims with railroad spikes. Very pleasant. Well, here's some good news: he's barely two hundred. He's not even as old as Angel is. (frowns) Oh.
Xander: That's a bad look, right?
Giles: I think your suggesting of running away this Saturday might have been a good one. Spike has fought two
Slayers in the last century, and... he's killed them both.
Cut to the lounge. Buffy and Willow see Snyder come back in with Joyce. She comes up to her
daughter.
Buffy and Willow exchange a concerned look. Buffy starts to follow her mom out. She turns her head
to look back at Snyder, who's going around turning off the lights. Joyce waits for Buffy to join her,
and they walk out of the room. Snyder goes to another switch by the back wall next to a large window
and turns it off. Two vampires suddenly come crashing through the window. Buffy looks back into
the room. Several more vampires follow, and they storm into the room. The people panic and begin to
run around. Buffy comes back into the room. The vampires have lined themselves up.
~~~~~~~~~~ Part 3 ~~~~~~~~~~
The lounge. Spike attacks. Buffy grabs a chair and throws it at him, tripping him up. She runs back
out of the room and grabs her mother's hand. She turns down the hall to the right, but more vampires
come in that way, so she goes the other way. In the lounge Spike grabs hold of a man.
Cut to the hall. Another vampire is guarding an exit. Buffy heads in another direction.
Snyder and several others run past her as she shoves a cleaning cart into the two vampires chasing
them. Willow and Cordelia come running out of the lounge and nearly trip over them. They head to
their right, but a vampire grabs Cordelia and she screams. Willow grabs a bust from a display pedestal
and wields it back for a swing.
The vampire looks up and Willow swings the bust hard into his face, knocking him off of Cordelia.
Willow grabs her hand and pulls her into a closet. Cut to the hall outside the library. Giles, Jenny and
Xander come running out.
They see Buffy's group running toward them.
They look behind them and see a vampire. They run back into the library and hold the door shut as
the vampire slams into it. Buffy opens the door to the science classroom.
The people all run into the room. Buffy follows them in last and closes the door as the two vampires
come running into the hall and begin banging on the door. Cut inside the classroom. Snyder and
another man maneuver a storage cabinet in front of the door. Buffy runs over to the other door and
closes and locks it. The power goes out. Cut to the library. Giles, Jenny and Xander look up from
barricading the doors as the lights go off and the emergency lights come on. Cut to the hall outside
the lounge. Spike is still holding on to the man.
Spike: And the Slayer?
Vampire#2: She either went that way (points to his right) or that way. (points to his left) I saw two others.
Spike: You don't know?! (lets go of the man) I'm a veal kind of guy. You're too old to eat. (grabs his head and
snaps his neck) But not to kill. (looks at vampire#2) I feel better.
Cut to the library. Giles tries the phone, but it's dead.
Xander: No, I'm not going anywhere until I know that Buffy and Willow are alright.
Giles: No one will be alright unless we get some help!
Xander gives in and goes. Cut to the classroom.
Joyce: I didn't get much of a look, but is there something wrong with their faces? I...
Snyder: Yes! PCP! It's a gang on PCP! We've gotta get out of here.
He grabs a desk, sets it in front of a window and starts climbing.
Snyder: You don't tell me! I tell you!
Buffy: (pulls him down) They will kill everybody in this room. Nobody goes out, nobody comes in until *I* say so. Do you hear me?
Snyder: Who do you think you are?
Buffy: I'm the one that knows how to stop them.
She looks up and walks across the room, trying to find a way into the ceiling. Joyce grabs her by the
shoulders.
Buffy: I know. That's why I'm going up there.
She grabs a stool, sets it on a lab table, climbs up and pushes a ceiling panel aside. She looks down
at her mom.
She lifts herself up into the ceiling. Cut to the halls. Spike is looking for Buffy.
The camera closes on the closet where Willow and Cordelia are hiding. Cut inside. Cordelia is holding
a broom for defense.
Cordelia: (whispers) Oh, God, oh, God!
Willow clasps her hand around Cordelia's mouth to keep her quiet. Cut to the hall. Spike is about to
kick the closet door open when he's distracted.
They listen and hear activity in the ceiling. Cut to Buffy crawling through the ceiling space. Cut to
the hall.
Cut to the library. Giles stuffs several stakes into his jacket pockets, grabs a battle-axe from the table
and heads toward the door.
Giles starts to push his way through the barricade they constructed.
Giles: (looks at Jenny) Listen! I am the Watcher! I am responsible for her, and I have, I have to go!
He starts pushing things aside again.
He looks back at her again.
Giles: Push these back as soon as I...
Buffy breaks through the ceiling and drops to the floor. Jenny steps back in surprise. Giles lifts his axe.
Buffy takes off her sweater.
Buffy: Principal Snyder, my mother and four others are locked in the science room across the hall. Willow and Cordelia ran the other way. (puts on Xander's bag) I don't know if they're... Where's Xander?
Giles: He got out through the stacks. He's getting Angel.
Jenny helps Buffy put crosses and stakes into the bag.
Giles: Let me help you.
Buffy: Giles, my mother's in that room. If I don't make it out of here, I know you'll make sure she does.
Giles: Bloody right, I will. Fair enough. What's your plan?
Buffy: Well, they split up to hold us here, so I'm gonna take 'em one on one. Set 'em up and knock 'em down.
She grabs a stool and positions it under the hole in the ceiling. She gets up on the stool and lifts
herself back up.
Cut to the science classroom. Snyder is pacing.
Snyder: This is my school. What I say goes, and I say this is *not* happening.
Joyce: Well, then I guess the danger's over!
Man: I'm not waiting for them to open the doors. I'm gettin' out!
Joyce: Don't be an idiot!
Snyder: I'm beginning to see a certain mother-daughter resemblance.
The man climbs up to the window and lifts the sash.
Snyder: She's a student. What does she know?
He takes off his jacket and goes to help the man. The two of them begin bending back the metal slats
blocking the window. Cut to the hall. A vampire throws himself against the science classroom door. It
doesn't budge. He sees Spike looking at him.
Spike: Use your head.
He grabs the vampire by the shoulder and shoves his head into a fire emergency case containing an
ax. He pulls the ax out, thrusts it into the vampire's hands and continues down the hall. He passes two
others pounding on another door.
One of the vampires follows him. Cut to the science classroom. The vampire begins swinging the ax
at the door. Joyce casts a worried look at Snyder and the other man. They get two slats bent aside.
The man starts to pull himself through the opening. Snyder helps, but lets go when the man begins to
kick and scream while struggling with something outside. Snyder watches as the man is pulled
through the window and then steps down. Joyce quickly climbs up, bends the slats back and closes
the sash. Cut to the hall. Spike is listening for activity in the ceiling. He pinpoints her sound. Cut to
the ceiling space. Buffy is making her way through it. Cut outside. The man lies dead on the grass.
Xander and Angel see him.
Angel grabs Xander by the throat.
Angel drags him into the building. Cut to the closet.
Willow: (whispers) He could come back!
Cordelia: (looks at Willow) What are we gonna do?
Willow: Pray.
Cut to the ceiling space. Buffy keeps crawling. Cut to the lounge. Spike finds two metal poles and
throws one to the other vampire as he goes back into the hall. He listens for a moment and then
shoves the pole up into the ceiling. The other vampire follows suit. Cut to the ceiling space. Buffy
sees a pole poke through right in front of her. She begins backing up. Cut to the hall. The vampire has
almost chopped through the door to the science classroom. He steps around the corner to warn the
other vampire.
He goes back to chopping when Buffy breaks through the ceiling behind him. She pulls him down
with her as she drops from the ceiling and quickly dispatches him with a stake. Joyce is looking
through the hole in the door, but can't see much of anything. Buffy gets up and looks through the
hole.
Buffy: I'm fine, mom.
Joyce: Buffy, look, uh, get out of here, okay? We'll be alright!
Buffy: Look, just hang on for one more minute until I tell you to open the door.
She quietly makes her way to the other hall, stake in hand. She peeks around the corner and see the
other vampire standing there with his back to her. She hears a noise behind her and looks.
Sheila: Sorry I'm late. There's some really weird guys outside.
Buffy: Shh! Yeah, I know. They're trying to kill us.
Sheila: (picks up the ax and smiles) This should be fun.
Buffy slowly heads back to the other hall. Cut to Spike still poking the poles into the ceiling. Angel
comes into the hall with Xander. Spike sees him.
Angel wraps his arm around Xander's neck.
Spike: I'll be damned!
He tosses his pole aside and they greet each other with a hug and a laugh.
Spike: I did. I'm surrounded by idiots. What's new with you?
Angel: Everything.
Spike: Yeah. Come up against this Slayer yet?
Angel: She's cute. Not to bright, though. Gave the puppy dog 'I'm all tortured' act. Keeps her off my back when I feed! (laughs)
Spike: (laughing) People still fall for that Anne Rice routine. What a world!
Xander: I knew you were lying.
Angel gives Xander a squeeze to shut him up.
Angel Grabs him by the hair and shirt and holds up his exposed neck.
Cut to Buffy. She and Sheila are about to round the corner.
She goes into the other hall and quietly makes her way to the vampire, holding her stake up and
ready. Behind her Sheila vamps out and raises the ax.
The halls. Sheila raises her ax. Giles sees through the round library door window behind her and yells
out a warning.
She spins around and grabs the ax from Sheila in mid swing. She swings it around and hits Sheila in
the jaw with the butt of the handle. The other vampire attacks and ducks as Buffy swings the ax at
him. The ax gets buried in the wall. The vampire smiles as he straightens back up, thinking he avoided
her blow, but then looks down at the stake protruding from his chest. He collapses to the floor and
bursts into ashes. Buffy looks over at Sheila and watches her run from the hall, then rushes back to
the classroom door.
Joyce: (opens the door) Okay, come on, let's go!
Everyone rushes out of the classroom and into the library.
Buffy: (to Giles) Get them out!
Joyce: You're coming too!
Buffy: In a minute! Go! (rushes off)
Joyce: (watching her go) Buffy!
Cut to Spike and Angel.
Angel: I'm not much for company.
Spike: No, you never were. So, why're you so scared of this Slayer?
Angel: Scared?
Spike: Yeah. Time was you would've taken her out in a heartbeat. Now look at you. I bet this, uh, torture thing is an act, right? You're not housebroken.
Angel: I saw her kill the Master. Hey, you think you can take her alone? Be my guest. I'll just feed and run. (roars and bends to Xander's neck)
Spike: (holds up his hand) Don't be silly! We're old friends. We'll do it together. Let's drink to it.
They both slowly lean in to Xander's next. At the last moment Spike punches Angel in the face,
making him stagger back.
Angel: Things change.
Spike: Not us! Not demons! Man, I can't believe this. You Uncle Tom! (grabs his pole from the floor) Come on,
people! This isn't a spectator sport!
The vampires roar and attack. Xander barges out the door behind him and runs. Angel follows as the
other vampires give chase. Spike senses someone behind him and looks up.
Buffy: (holding the ax) Do we really need weapons for this?
Spike: I just like them. They make me feel all manly.
He drops the pole and slowly steps toward Buffy. She drops the ax.
Buffy slowly walks to the middle of the hall, watching him intently.
Buffy: You shouldn'ta come here.
Spike: No. I've messed up your doilies and stuff. But I just got so bored. (smirks) I'll tell you what. As a personal favor from me to you I'll make it quick. It won't hurt a bit.
Buffy: No, Spike. It's gonna hurt a lot.
They start to fight. Cut outside. Angel and Xander fight the other vampires. Cut to the hall. Buffy and
Spike exchange several blows. He throws her into the wall. Cut to the library. Joyce is following
everyone out through the stacks when she stops and wonders what happened to her daughter.
Cut outside. Xander avoids several punches and kicks. His own punch misses, and he gets kicked to
the ground from behind. Cut to the hall. Buffy and Spike keep fighting. Cut outside. The vampire has
Xander by the neck. Angel punches her off of him. The others get up again and run from the fight. Cut to the hall. Buffy ducks a punch and lands four of her own in a row. Spike grabs her arm and
shoves her into the wall. She slides down it quickly, and Spike's next punch goes through the wall.
She gets behind him and kicks him high and hard in the neck.
He pulls his arm out of the wall, ripping a stud out with it, and swings it into Buffy's face. She flies
back and lands on the floor, stunned.
He stands over her and wields the stud back to slam it into her, but he gets hit in the head with the ax.
He goes sprawling to the floor and looks up at his attacker. Joyce stands above him with the ax in her
hands, ready to swing again.
Spike holds the stud above himself to protect against any blows. Buffy gets to her feet.
He gets up and runs through the lounge and out the broken window.
They embrace. Buffy looks out the window. Cut to later outside. The police are everywhere. The
camera pans down to the Police Chief talking to an officer.
The officer nods and leaves. The Chief walks over to his car. Snyder comes up to him.
Chief: It's over. They all got away. I got a body inside, and I got another one on the south lawn. And it looks like he was pulled right through the window.
Snyder: I told him not to go through that window.
Cut to Giles and Jenny coming out of the building.
Giles: Uh, yes. You know, um, I will understand if you decide to start avoiding me.
Jenny takes Giles' arm, and they walk off together. Cut to Angel and Xander.
Angel: I told you. I couldn't make the first move. I had to see if he was buying it or not.
Xander: A-and if he bit me, what then?
Angel: We would've known he bought it.
Xander stops as Angel continues on.
Cut to Snyder and the Chief.
Snyder: So?
Chief: So? You want the usual story? Gang related? PCP?
Snyder: What'd you have in mind? The truth?
Chief: (considers) Right. Gang related. PCP.
Cut to Buffy and Joyce.
Joyce: Principal Snyder said you were a troublemaker.
Buffy looks down in shame.
Buffy looks back up.
Buffy: About how long 'til this wears off and you start ragging on me again?
Joyce: Oh, at least a week and a half.
Buffy: Very cool!
Cut to later. The last Police car leaves the school. Cut to the hall. The camera pans over to the utility
closet. Cut inside. Cordelia is kneeling in prayer. Willow stares at her in disbelief.
Willow: Ask for some aspirin.
Cordelia: And can you please send some asp... Hey!
Cut to morning. The sun comes up over the complex where the vampires gather. The camera pans
over to their warehouse. Cut inside. Sunlight is streaming through a high window. Spike is standing
by a cage. Drusilla walks around the cage to him.
Spike: It was close, baby, but...
Drusilla: Oh, come here.
She pulls his head down onto her shoulder and strokes his cheek and neck.
Drusilla: You'll kill her, and then we'll have a nice celebration.
Spike: Yeah, a party.
Drusilla: Yeah. With streamers... and songs.
Spike: (lifts his head from her shoulder) How's the annoying one?
Drusilla: He doesn't wanna play.
Spike: Figures. Well, suppose I better go make nice.
He walks over to Colin and kneels before him.
Spike: I, uh... I offer penance.
Vampire#2: Penance?! You should lay down your life! Our numbers are depleted, the feast of St. Vigious has been *ruined* by your impatience!
Spike: I was rash, and if I had to do it all over again... (breaks out in laughter) Who am I kidding? (stands up) I would do it exactly the same, only I'd do this... (grabs Colin)
Colin: No!
Spike: ...first!
He carries Colin over to the cage. Vampire#2 tries to stop him, but Spike kicks back and knocks him
out. He sticks Colin in the cage and closes and locks the door. Drusilla watches as Spike starts pulling
a chain, lifting the cage up from the floor.
He gives the chain a final strong pull, and the cage is lifted into the sunlight. Colin screams. Drusilla
smiles at Spike. He smiles back. They come together and hold hands.
The camera pans up to the cage as they go. The last residue of Colin is still steaming
{Some Assembly Required}
{Inca Mummy Girl}
{The Series 2 Index}
{The Index}